Ikea TV?!??!?!?!

When I was a self-righteous college schmuck, I frequently joked that if aliens were to take over the Earth, they’d do it through Ikea. Global, democratized aesthetics with the whiff of fascism. I was particularly mad about the store layout. Like every other self-righteous schmuck.

I’m hardly the first schmuck  to get worked up into an overly intellectualized frenzy about the blue and gold juggernaut. But you know, the most frustrating self-assembly I ever tried not to drill my fingers for was NOT from Ikea. It was from Costco. It was a composter.

Well, while various tech companies are racing to build the best Internet-enabled TV, Ikea has been quietly building its own TVs into laquered eurofurniture.

Wires are all hidden, sub-woofers are included, the storage cabinet for all your unsightly Wiis and Xboxes are covered in fabric, so the slicko remote control will work them without your having to look at them.

The funniest part of this video was the group of “cineastes” evaluating the product.

One of them said that it was “OK for TV, but not for film.”

That’s exactly right, my sophisticate friend. I was shocked that Ikea put that clip into their marketing video. But they did.

Ikea’s for TV fans.

Film fans: go back to Apple and Restoration Hardware and rebuild your antique speaker cabinets to house your surround sound.

To be honest, the design of these units disappointed me. But maybe that’s because I like fill-um.

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